Childish Behavior

When I was in undergrad I was working for a law firm as a messenger delivering letters, filing documents in the courthouse, etc. I was working there for a while when the firm decided to hire another person. They hired this white guy who looked like he just got back from a Dave Mathews Band concert with his hair all over the place, a track jacket and non-matching soccer socks. I may not be completely accurate about what he was wearing the first day I saw him but it is definitely what he wore other days. I took one look at him and thought that he was an indigent client and was in desperate need of help, we'll call him Jake.

Jake was the new messenger and we became good friends along the way. We did many things we shouldn't have done but since they loved us so much at the firm we got away with a lot. On the nice summer days we would sometimes take our bosses lexus for a wash or maintenance shop. We would think of a lie so we both could leave at the same time and we both could cruise with this nice ride (in case you're wondering it was, at the time, one of the first lexus SC430, red, hard top convertible, nice car). Of course we would take the long way to go to these places.

One of the many childish things I would do to embarrass him was something like; I would pull next to a girl (didn't matter if she was good looking or not) I would say to Jake "damn Jake check her out." Not knowing the goldnugget for his childish behavior, he would look at the girl and I would whistle at her or say something like "DAAAAAMMMMMNNN," the girl would turn to look in our direction and she would see Jake looking at her thinking it was him that whistled or said that. He would just give this embarrassed smile and call me an asshole.

Childish right? I tried to do as many things to embarrass him. I think one of the worse things I did was the following. We would often say racial things to each other and I would play the racial card, and minorities always win this game. I was driving with a bunch of my friends (all hispanic) in a car. It was a Puerto Rican friend of mine driving his Toyota corolla, circa 1980, and it was about 7 of us packed in this tiny car (I think we met the quota for generalizations about hispanics, you know, PR always driving toyota, hispanics packing as many people in one car, etc). Any way we were driving in the parking lot of the Athletic center of UWM. As we're making the turn I notice Jake walking by himself, looking as stragly as always, towards his car. He noticed me in the car and said something, I can't remember what it was. I stick half of my body out the window and I jokingly yell "KILL WHITEY!!!"
What's so embarrassing you say? Well, what I didn't notice was that not to far behind him was a group of about 10 black guys, which I'm sure just got done playing basketball. They heard me scream "kill whitey," and they noticed Jake and his appearance, and started laughing really loud. Jake also noticed the black guys behind him and all he could do was just put his head down in shame and embarrassment.

Some may think that was mean, but Jake and I still laugh about it to the day. Some may ask "why would u say kill whitey." Well the answer to that is simple. The night before I watched Black Sheep with Chris Farley. There is a scene in the movie were he goes back stage to talk to the reggae groups that is about to go on stage. Being Jamaican and a reggea group called for them to smoke weed. Chris gets high from the smoke, gets on stage and starts singing with the band and then he starts talking, getting the crowd going and then he screams "KILL WHITEY."
(freakinrican, you know what I'm talking about right?)
Obviously this scene was fresh in my head and I was compelled to say it.