Cracker

This word came up twice this past weekend. I was mowing the lawn listening to Bigger and Blacker by Chris Rock. There is a part there were he's talking about old man Willie, and he says "cracka ass cracka." I was laughing at the word and how ridiculous it is for that to be an insult, it's like me saying "humus ass humus" to a Jew and him taking offense to that. Anyway the real point to this is how the word Cracker came up a second time.

It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon and I was home watching college football. The wife was tired from a loooooong night with the baby staying up and she was sleeping. That left me with the many responsibilities of watching very active twin daughters. To say the least I did as little as possible, not because I was lazy (well maybe a bit) but because I was also tired.

The twins woke up from their nap at around noon. I gave them spaghetti and I was keeping them company. One of my daughters saw crackers on the table and she asked "papi cookies please?" I then look at her and say "honey, this is a cracker not a cookie, can you say cracker?"
She looks at me and says "No cracka, is a cookie?"

I say "no, say cracker"
daughter "cracka"
Me "cracker"
her "cracka"
Me "that's good, don't forget, this is a cracker and those are cookies."

What a good dad right, teaching his daughter the difference between a cracker and a cookie. This lesson was almost deadly.

Later that after noon the family went to the mall to take a stroll. We're in the food court, and there is a lot of people, WHITE people. We're get chinese food at the food court and we get those lovely fortune cookies. Just as a white guy passes by our table, my daughter points (from a certain angle it would've looked like she was pointing at the guy, but she was pointing at the cookie) and says "cracka."

OH shit, I hope he didn't hear that. I don't think he did but there was a slight flinch as he walked that made me think twice. I quietly lean over to my daughter and say "honey, this is a cookie not a cracker." Again, a white girl passes by and my daughter says "NO, cracka." This time the girl kind of turns her head, but doesn't say anything. I hope she didn't think the worse. Lucky for me, my daughters aren't speaking quite as clearly yet. If they would've stopped and ask her to repeat it, they would've understood her, but since they didn't my Brown ass got lucky. Undoubtedly my wife looks at me in disappointment and says "See what you teach them?"

The goldnugget of the day is: If you have kids just learning to talk, watch what you say because when you least expect it they will repeat something you said earlier. It could be nothing or it could be as bad as being the only minority, surrounded by whites and your kid says CRACKA.